10 Ways to Know You Were 'That Person' on St. Patty's

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Boston is a sea of green around St. Patty's Day. The bars are filled to capacity. Restaurants are jammed.  Parties are happening at every other apartment. It serves as a really good reason for people to get together and hang out. For some the day can be a little much, because they revel a little to much in St. Patty's Day spirit. 

10 Ways to Know that You Were 'That Person' on St. Patty's: 

• You knock a bar, stocked with expensive alcohol, down a complete flight of stairs. 
• You slowly moved away from the bar if you either threw up there or knocked something over, because you know you are too drunk to clean it up
• You stay up until 3am, only to wake up watch the parade, and pass out drunk again by 11am.
• You are hitting on a chick or dude that isn't attractive, because you are too drunk to know better.
• You invite people to a party where you don't know anybody, and no one knows you. 
• You find people randomly saying, "Eat something. Have a glass of water." 
• You are sunburned from going to the beach for a St. Patty's Day dip, but you passed on a dune instead 
• You find yourself in a cab with no money, because someone put you there 
• You wake up in the morning and don't where you are or who the person is next to you 
• Your neighbor won't talk to you for weeks/years, because your party spilled over onto their property  

Isn't That Poopy?

I grew up on a farm. I was surrounded by poop. It was just part of living on a farm. Yes, you stepped in it from time to time, it was just part of living on a farm. However, one thing that I thought that I could gain when I moved away from the farm, which I only visit from time to time, is the ability to not step in dog poop at random.  That is exactly what happened the other day. 

It was dark out. I was walking out to my car with a friend to go out somewhere, and I felt that unmistakable squish under my shoe, I just knew it had happened. The obligatory words came out of my mouth, and for the next five minutes I'm doing the Michael Jackson Moon Walk in an effort to get the poop off my shoe. All the while my friend is trying to comfort me, which lead to the comment that, "There are two types of people in the world. Those that have stepped in dog poop, and those that haven't stepped in dog poop yet." Yeah, thanks for those comforting words. Somehow, that never helps when that awful smell is burning your nostrils. 

My question is why do I have to step in dog poop at all? Why can't people, off the farm, bring a little plastic baggy with them on their walks. I've done it, and will continue to do it. Yes, it's fine if your dog runs back in the woods where you can see him, and does his business. You don't have to clean it up then. However, when you are walking on a road, and your Great Dane takes his moment by the side of a car door, I beg. Please pick it up! 

Otherwise, you are the oblivious pet owner! You don't want to be that, do you? 

I Lift Things Up and Put Them Down

The gym. You lift things up and put them down. It might just be your legs, but for many people it is dumbbells. However, dumbbells at the gym takes on a whole new meeting when you are talking about the oblivious gym member.

Let's review them.

Mr. Uuunnnggghhhh - If you can't handle the weight you are lifting, maybe you shouldn't be lifting it. You are wasting more energy than you should when you are doing this uuunnngggghhhh sound, and it sounds like you are ripping something important when you do it.

Mr. & Mrs. Snap - The gym is NOT meant to be a photo-shoot set for your Facebook page. It's a place that you are come to work out. It's not like the hair salon where you go to look pretty, it's a place for sweating and working out.

The Gym Potato - Yes, people, there are televisions at the gym. Yes, they are there for you to look at while you are treading along on the elliptical machine, and 95% of the time people aren't even listening to them. They are working out to the music that they have one their own iPod, etc. It is not your house and, yes, there are people that are interested in using the machine that you are currently using to sit and do nothing on while watching TV.

Mr. or Mrs. I Don't Get Why I'm Not Loosing Weight Going to the Gym - So, you bought a gym membership. Congrats! You are half way to getting skinny and shedding those pounds. Surprisingly, the other half is about working out, which includes cardio, weight lifting, and those things that lift your heart rate up a bit. It's not meant for sitting on your butt or sucking on your 60 ounce Slurpy.

Ms. and Mrs. Spandex - Spandex can be very nice for going to the gym. It breathes, it moves with you, but don't abuse it people. I do not want to see your camel toe poking out, the dimples only your significant other should see, or how big your package is, thank you.

You Want to See My Birthday Suit - You work out. You get sweaty. You have a date afterwards, or, maybe a game of bridge. So, you have to shower at the gym. Great, that's what the shower is for, but parading around like it's a nude beach on Fire Island isn't for the weak of heart. I complement you in your feeling free with your body, but it might not be what everyone wants to see. I'm just saying.

Mr. or Mrs. Sloppy Seconds - Thanks for the offer to let me sit, lean against, rub against your sweaty drippings, but I'd prefer not to. There is a towel and spray for a reason. Use it!

Then, drum role please, there is................

Mr. I See London, I See France, I See Your Underpants (or Worse) - In yoga class or while you are doing leg presses, there are some moves that you shorts slide down. It happens, but it shouldn't a traumatic event, where you are left twitching with disgust or feeling like you opened a naughty magazine. Please, I beg of you, buy some underpants.

Hello, let me introduce myself, I'm a customer

Over the weekend, I went to the dentist and was surprised by the customer services that was delivered. I walked right in, and was taken right in for my cleaning. When I was done and it was time to talk about a random bill that I was getting, and they couldn't explain that amount I was getting charged, they took care of it. It was amazing. Out of all the places I would have guessed that I would receive good customer service, it wouldn't have been at the dentist. If the dentist can do it, why can't others. Perhaps, I am getting older or it's just something that I notice, but customer service is harder to come by these days. 

We've all been there. We walk up to the counter looking to check out, and Chatty Cathy 1 and Chatty Cathy 2 are talking about their weekends. You stand there starring at them, and the conversation just keeps going. You stand there a little longer. Maybe you pull out your credit card to help them see that you are looking to check out, alas no movement. Perhaps, a little clearing of the throat, "Ehhh...Hhhmmm." Nope. Still not working. Hmmm... you take on another strategy...knock something over...knock into something. Yep, that does it. 

Having worked for a five star hotel for a couple of years, customer service takes so little effort, and it's so nice when it is done. 

The following are just a few things businesses could do to make their customers happy:  

1. Answer the phone - it's so nice to get a real person on the phone. 

2. Listen to your customers - it's nice when the old adage, "The customer is always right," comes into play (even if they aren't right). At least make the customer feel heard, by saying, "I understand," or, "how can I help fix this," and many more simple sentences.  

3. Deal with complaints, don't fight them. People seem to be focused on saying, "Oh well, you can't please everyone," but you can certainly try. Your business might reap the rewards by trying to be understanding.

4. Help a person out. If someone is looking to solve a solution and you help them out, it might help you in the future. It could be as simple as helping them with directions. 

5. Follow through. If you say something is going to be done by a certain time, be sure that it's done by that certain time. Nothing pisses a customer off more than their expectations not being met when someone tells them something is going to be done by certain time. 

6. Train your employees. Make sure your employees know what you expect from them, when it comes to customer service. 

7. Take the extra step. If someone is looking for something, help them find it. Maybe even go with them to find it. People LOVE that kind of customer service. 

8. My very favorite customer service idea is when a little something extra is thrown in to mix. Who doesn't love a freebie. It doesn't need to be done every time, but when the situation calls for it. Why not? 

Why is all this important? No one likes an oblivious customer service person.